What happens at your first session

When someone contacts me for the first time, I am often asked the question of what happens at my first session.. 

Making that first contact with a counsellor or psychotherapist can feel daunting. You might have apprehension about what happens next and I thought it would be helpful to give a bit of information here. 

On the practical side of things, our first session would be 50 minutes long on an agreed day and time between us. 

We would agree whether you wanted to meet face to face or online, and I would let you know my fee for the session (normally my usual individual therapy fee as outlined on my website). 

If seeing me face to face, my therapy rooms are near public transport (bus and main train lines), or there is car parking nearby. My therapy rooms are welcoming, with lots of natural light and soft furnishings. 

When I see someone for our first session, it is a 'getting to know' each other session and for you to see how I work and how our session feels for you. 

It is a chance for you to tell me why you would like some counselling and psychotherapy and for me to ask a few basic questions to see whether I have the experience and specialism to see you for ongoing sessions. 

Occasionally I may decide that it would be more helpful for you to see a colleague with specific expertise or other forms of support. I would discuss this with you and give you their contact details to decide if you would like to contact them. 

Therefore, making that first contact with me often means a positive start towards getting the help and support you need, whether it is seeing me or being signposted onwards.

It is your choice whether to continue with sessions, and our first session together is a 'taster' for you to decide if you would like ongoing sessions or not. 

If you feel you would like to continue with sessions, it would be a weekly commitment, and we would agree on a day and time that we see each other each week. This day and time would be yours for as long as you want counselling and psychotherapy sessions with me. 

I am  also sometimes asked why the need for weekly sessions. Having weekly sessions allows for a build-up of stability to enable you to focus on what is troubling you and helps form a relationship between us of connection and trust. 

In the current climate of the increasing cost of living, private therapy can seem expensive. I understand that you want to know what benefit you would get from committing to the time and expense of weekly therapy rather than perhaps talking to a trusted friend or colleague. 

There is a difference between being listened to by a sympathetic friend or colleague and counselling and psychotherapy. 

A counsellor or psychotherapist is not only there to offer support but also to actively listen, without judgement or interruption, to the difficulties you are experiencing. 

The sessions are focused on you and, as they are weekly, at the same time each week, give consistency rather than an ad hoc conversation with a friend. 

As a trained and qualified UKCP Registered Psychotherapist, I will ask specific skilled questions to help focus on your experiences, thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that may need more investigation in a safe and confidential environment. 

Friends or colleagues may not know how to respond if you are distressed, and you may feel that you do not want to tell them everything for fear of upsetting them. 

This is not the case in counselling and psychotherapy, where you are seen in an empathetic and non-judgmental space. 

Counselling and psychotherapy can help bring to light unhelpful thought patterns or ways of relating to yourself or others, which can take time. The time that friends or colleagues may not be able to give you. 

Having supportive people around us who we can offload and talk to is helpful. However, counselling and psychotherapy give you the time and space to focus entirely on yourself, be listened to and heard, and come to a better understanding of yourself and what you feel you would like to change. 

Therefore, deciding on having the first session with a qualified, skilled, and experienced counsellor or psychotherapist can be an investment towards a life-changing experience, one that can lead to a life of increased happiness and fulfilment.